"We were together in the lunch line. Kevin and I got the government lunch. He took a brownie from one of the other plates and added it to his own, hiding it under his fries. Then he complained to the lunch lady that the brownies weren't big enough and she gave him another one. Then he took my brownie, which was cool because I don't like them. But then I thought about it and that was like FOUR brownies. "

"We went on a hay ride and he kept saying that the people who went on it the previous year had all died because the horse had been wearing blinders and walked off a cliff. I kept telling him to shut up, but he said things like. 'What? About how we're all going to die?...when we fall of f the cliff?' I told him it wasn't funny, but he kept doing it. Then he got high and kept sticking his face really close to mine and saying 'Does this bother you? It sure as hell bothers me.' Then, on the way home, he took me to a Gino's parking lot and tried to get to second base.  I wouldn't let him and he accused me of being a communist.  What the hell does that mean?"

"He was in choral group with me, and we did a tribute to Guys and Dolls. His spot in the group was directly behind me, and on the night of the performance, during the  'Horse Right Here' song, he  substituted the name of each horse with 'Sheila's Ass.'  My name is Sheila, so you can imagine how angry I was.
...He also got me pregnant."

"That guy was a  bozack. Don't get me started. I'll spare you the details. But, in regard to the West Hill Sadie Hawkins Gymnasium Brawl of  '73-  HE STARTED IT. I was wrestling Jim Evans, and Kevin kept saying that we looked like we were 'getting it on.' I felt he needed an attitude adjustment, so I adjusted it with my fist."

"I never really talked to him. He was kind of nerdy, and not very good at sports. Who wants to talk to a guy like that? But he always got good grades. I asked him once if he would write my civics essay for me. I flirted a little bit and said I would pay him. He seemed kind of nervous, but agreed to write the paper. He gave it to me on the day it was due and I kissed him on the cheek. You know...I had to give him something. He left, and I opened the essay. It was just a bunch of National Geographic pictures, mostly naked tribal women, pasted onto loose-leaf paper, with 'Goodness Gracious!' scrawled over and over again in purple crayon. Fortunately my teacher had a crush on me, and I got a 'c' anyway. Later, I got Jim Evans to beat Kevin up. What a spaz."

"Kevin was an instigator, a ne'er-do-well. I've seen plenty of rabble-rousers pass through these doors, but Kevin was the worst. A contumacious little bastard if I ever saw one. If  I wasn't the principal, I'd have given him a clop in the chops."

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